Sinful anger is involved in the vast majority of other life issues – marriage, parenting, crisis counselling, conflict resolution.

Destructive results of anger

• Conflict (Prov 15:18)
• Foolish behaviour (Prov 25:28)
• Broken relationships (Prov 18:19)
• More anger (Prov 19:19) Anger is habit forming – the more you get angry, the angrier you get. Note: the Bible does not teach catharsis as a means of dealing with anger. Punching a pillow, shouting while alone in a room, doing combat sports is thought to release anger. Biblically, the more anger is expressed, the more of it there will be.
• More sin – hurtful words, lies, slander, bitterness, gossip.
• Satanic opportunity (Eph 4:26)

Overcoming Anger

1. Accepting responsibility. Angry people blame God, other people, and circumstances for their anger. Biblically, we get angry because we have strong desires that are not met (James 1:12-13, 4:1).
2. Call our anger-sins by biblical names
   • Impatience (1 Thes 5:14-15) – Impatience is mental, verbal, or non-verbal revenge, repayment, or retaliation. It is repaying the “evil” of inconvenience with mental complaining, a sharp word, rolling the eyes, or a glare of disgust.
   • Bitterness (Eph 4:31) – Bitterness is settled anger, a brooding, nursed and recycled resentment. Clamming up is the opposite of blowing up – but they are both forms of sinful anger.
   • Wrath (Eph 4:31) – animosity, fury, rage, exasperation.
   • Clamour (Eph 4:31) – raised-voice shouting, back and forth argument.
   • Evil-speaking (Eph 4:31) – angry insults, attacking words, name-calling, mocking, untrue accusations.
   • Malice (Eph 4:31) – the desire to hurt another person, crush him or her emotionally, make another look foolish.
3. Confess anger as a sin to God. Seek forgiveness from God and from the people he has been angry at.
4. Track the beginnings of anger – internal or external expressions of it (fists clenched, raised voice, red face, tight feeling in stomach, resentful thoughts, etc.).
5. Consider your motives in anger. What is it that you want that anger pursues? Manipulation of others, intimidation of others, revenge for hurt, protection from threats.
6. Replace the “I deserve” mentality behind the sinful desire with a biblical view of God, others and self.
7. Repent of angry responses
   • Verbal or non-verbal retaliation for inconvenience (impatience)
   • Brooding over past wrongs (bitterness)
   • Getting steamed up when his “rights” have been violated (anger/wrath)
   • Cranking up the volume when he disagrees with someone (clamour)
   • Insulting, hurtful words (evil speaking)
   • Wishing evil on another person or working for his hurt (malice)
8. By the Holy Spirit’s power, replace anger with godly opposites:
   • Kindness (Eph 4:32)
   • Tenderheartedness (Eph 4:32) – Compassion or tender-heartedness views another person’s sin as something to be forgiven, not as an opportunity for anger.
   • Forgiveness (Eph 4:32)
   • Patience – Patience replaces the sin of retaliating for inconvenience.
   • Humility (Rom 12:3)
   • Self-Control (Prov 16:32)
   • Momentary Silence (Prov 15:28)
   • Gentle words (Prov 15:1)
   • Refusal to take revenge (Prov 20:22)
   • Self-control
9. Maintain certain spiritual disciplines: prayer, Scripture memory regarding anger – especially Proverbs, journaling regarding anger, and avoiding people and media that encourage anger.

What About Righteous Anger

God is angry at sin because it offends and desecrates His glory. Seldom do sinners properly approximate this righteous demand that sin be turned to righteousness.

Genuine righteous anger is:

1. Momentary.
2. Not expressed with clamour, evil speaking, etc.
3. Over sin and its effects.
4. Concerned with God’s glory, not men’s.
5. Willing to trust God as Judge (Prov 20:22; Ecc 12:14; 1 Pet 2:23).