Philemon 1:1 Paul, a prisoner of Christ Jesus, and Timothy our brother, To Philemon our beloved friend and fellow laborer, to the beloved Apphia, Archippus our fellow soldier, and to the church in your house:
Grace to you and peace from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ.
I thank my God, making mention of you always in my prayers, hearing of your love and faith which you have toward the Lord Jesus and toward all the saints, that the sharing of your faith may become effective by the acknowledgment of every good thing which is in you in Christ Jesus.
For we have great joy and consolation in your love, because the hearts of the saints have been refreshed by you, brother. (Phlm. 1:1-7)
On the 7th of December 1941, the Japanese bombed Pearl Harbour. An American sergeant, by the name of Jacob DeShazer was enraged, and blurted out “The Japs are going to pay for this.” DeShazer volunteered for a special unit that was formed to attack Japan. Known as the Doolittle raid, they flew B-25s on the night of 1 March 1942 into Japan. Because they had been spotted, they were forced to fly earlier and longer than they’d planned, and DeShazer’s B-25 ran out of fuel over enemy territory. He parachuted down, but was caught by the Japanese the next day. He was in prison for 40 months – 34 of them in solitary confinement. He was severely beaten and malnourished while three of the crew were executed by a firing squad, and another died of slow starvation. Here was a man who had come for revenge, finding his desire for revenge even greater.
After two years in prison, the Emperor of Japan ordered that the conditions of the POWS be somewhat improved, and a few books began circulating among the prisoners. One of them was a Bible. DeShazer was not a Christian, but he began reading the Bible. And when he came to Romans 10:9,
that if you confess with your mouth the Lord Jesus and believe in your heart that God has raised Him from the dead, you will be saved. (Rom. 10:9), and he believed in Christ. And his heart towards his Japanese captors began to change. The bitterness was gone, and he actually began treating them with respect. In 1945, the prison camp was liberated by American soldiers, and DeShazer returned to America. But three years later, he was back in Japan, this time as a missionary. For thirty years, he preached the Gospel to the people he had once hated.
He distributed tracts that contained his own story of finding forgiveness in Christ and then extending forgiveness. One of the men who came across that tract was Mitsuo Fuchida, the one who had led the attack on Pearl Harbour. He was a bitter man, after the war, and the Bushido, the Japanese way of the warrior taught that revenge was actually a duty.
He read that DeShazzer had read the Bible in prison and had been changed, so he decided to do that too. And when he came across the words of Christ on the cross, “Father, forgive them, they know what they are doing” he said his heart was pierced – because he felt that was him. He too was saved, and joined DeShazzar in sharing the Gospel around Japan, with thousands coming to Christ. When Fuchida died in 1976, DeShazzar was at his funeral and wept deeply over the loss of the man who was now his brother.
I don’t know that any other religion has such stories of forgiveness, and its power. That’s because forgiveness is not at the heart of any other religion. In Islam, the key is submission. In Judaism the key is your own good works. In Eastern religions it is getting good karma through good works.
But at the heart of Christianity is a story of a forgiving God. The story of the Prodigal Son, of a father scanning the horizon to look to see if his rebel boy has come home, and then throwing his arms around him, feeding him, clothing him, and receiving him back, is how Jesus helps us picture the heart of God.
Forgiveness is so central to the Gospel, that the New Testament makes this kind of deduction: Forgiven people forgive. One of the best tests of your own salvation is if you can and regularly do, forgive others. Those who have experienced grace, can’t help extending it. But those in the grip of bitterness, may only have a head-knowledge experience of grace. So forgiveness is a theme that is found throughout the Bible. No less than seventy-five word pictures are in the Bible describing forgiveness.
One of the most compelling treatments of forgiveness in the Bible, why we need it, what it is, how we do it, is found in the shortest and most personal letter of Paul: the book of Philemon.
The book of Philemon is a real-life story of forgiveness. The word forgiveness doesn’t actually appear, but it is the theme and main idea of the whole book. It’s a dramatic story of harm, injury, forgiveness, and reconciliation.
The three main characters are Paul, who is writing the letter, Philemon, a wealthy Christian man in the city of Colosse, and Onesimus, one of Philemon’s runaway slaves.
Let’s piece the story back together by looking at a few Scriptures in this book. Philemon was a member of the church at Colosse, his wife was probably Apphia, and their son was Archippus. As verse 2 puts it, he probably housed the church in his own home.
Philemon 1:1-2 Paul, a prisoner of Christ Jesus, and Timothy our brother, To Philemon our beloved friend and fellow laborer, to the beloved Apphia, Archippus our fellow soldier, and to the church in your house:
This means that Philemon was probably a wealthy man, and as was the economy of the time, he would have owned some slaves. One of them, at one time, was Onesimus. But Onesimus ran away.
Slavery in New Testament times was a mixed bag of good and evil. Slaves made up over one third of the population of the Empire. Slaves were not simply muscled brutes doing physical labour. Many slaves were doctors, teachers, cooks, accountants, musicians. Although they did not have the legal rights of freemen, by Paul’s time many of them were better off than freemen – often being assured of food, clothing, shelter, while freemen had to fend for themselves. Freedmen were often sleeping on the streets. Many slaves earned their own freedom over time, and many formed close friendships with their masters. The slavery of the Graeco-Roman world, and the slavery of the 1500s to 1800s was a very different thing.
Now all that to say that while slavery is not an example of God’s ideal for humanity, in this context, it was not necessarily evil for a Christian like Philemon to own slaves. As much as slavery was often an abuse, Peter and Paul don’t write against slavery as an institution. Christianity sowed seeds that really brought slavery down, but they didn’t attempt that social change directly through demonstration. They write that Christian masters must treat their slaves fairly, justly and gently. Christian slaves are told to submit, to work diligently, to serve Christ with their work and attitude. And we can give Philemon the benefit of the doubt that that is exactly how he treated his slaves, how he treated Onesimus.
And to understand this book, you have to understand this from Philemon’s point of view. In an economy that depended upon slavery, losing a slave could be a devastating financial blow. For a slave to run away was not the same as a labourer in our day giving his or her boss 24 hour’s notice. A runaway slave hurt his or her master. The master had often spent a lot of money to purchase them. There was huge cost in terms of replacing them, or tracking them down, or buying a new one. Often a runaway slave would steal whatever he could to sustain himself as he ran away. And if the master had been kind to his slaves, there would have a sense of personal betrayal.
For a slave to run away was a criminal act. Slaves were the property of their masters. Rome knew that if slaves thought lightly of running away from their masters, their whole economy could collapse. The slave rebellion of Spartacus was less than a 100 years before this day, and Rome was not about to tolerate another one. So runaway slaves faced severe penalties. Some were beaten severely. Some were branded with a ‘F’ on their heads for fugitivus. Some were crucified. A runaway slave had no claims, no rights, and no expectation of forgiveness.
Now Philemon was no ordinary master of slaves. He was a Christian. At some point Philemon came to know Jesus Christ as Saviour through Paul’s ministry. Paul says this in verse 19:
“I, Paul, am writing with my own hand. I will repay — not to mention to you that you owe me even your own self besides.”
Though Paul had never personally been to the area, Philemon had probably heard him preach in Ephesus or somewhere else.
Onesimus had run away from Philemon. We don’t know why he ran away. We have every reason to suspect that Philemon was a good master. But you can be a good parent and have a rebellious child, a good spouse and have an ungrateful, ungodly spouse, a good manager and have rebellious employees. More than likely, when Onesimus ran away, he stole some good and money as well, to keep himself going. Paul alludes to that later when saying he will repay Philemon anything owing.
So picture the hurt and pain of Philemon. He had probably bought Onesimus out of what would have been a harsher life under a cruel master. He had given him a good life. He had invested in him financially, taken care of him. I am sure Onesimus had been in the church services in the home, and heard God’s Word.
And now, he repays Philemon by running away. Not only is Philemon experiencing a blow financially, but he is being publicly humiliated. Slaves were known to run away from cruel and malicious masters, not from gentle and kind ones. So now what do people in Colosse think of Philemon? What does it do to the morale of his other household slaves? What does the church in his home now think of him? And then, at the deepest level, Philemon must feel betrayed. He must feel as you have, when the person you had at your dinner table, the person you shared meals with, turns around and slanders you, backbites, steals, betrays.
It seems Onesimus made his way to Rome, trying to lose himself in the crowds. But in God’s providence something else happened. He met up with Paul. There’s some debate over whether Paul was under a kind of house arrest, or whether he was in the Mamertine Prison, which was a true dungeon. By some marvellous providence, Onesimus ends up meeting Paul, hearing Paul. And even though he had heard the message in Colosse, this was Onesimus’ appointed day, and he believed in Jesus Christ. Onesimus had not only been running away from Philemon, but from God. And in His mercy, God had Onesimus meet up with Paul, hear the Gospel, and repent.
Philemon 1:10-11 I appeal to you for my son Onesimus, whom I have begotten while in my chains, who once was unprofitable to you, but now is profitable to you and to me.
The name Onesimus actually means profitable. As a runaway, he was unprofitable, but now as a believer, he was profitable. He began to assist Paul he became a member of Paul’s team. Paul could see real fruit in him. His life was now turning from rebellion and waste to a life of usefulness. Paul even began to see God’s providence in Onesimus’ rebellious running away.
Philemon 1:15-16 For perhaps he departed for a while for this purpose, that you might receive him forever, no longer as a slave but more than a slave — a beloved brother, especially to me but how much more to you, both in the flesh and in the Lord.
In fact, he had become something of a helper and a servant to Paul. His new-found faith filled him with a servant’s heart and spirit, and he was now being used by God in ministry. He was so useful that Paul was tempted to just keep him by his side, as a now-saved representative of Philemon’s household – Philemon having lost, but Paul having gained.
Philemon 1:13 whom I wished to keep with me, that on your behalf he might minister to me in my chains for the gospel.
But as much as Paul wanted to do that, he knew he couldn’t.
Philemon 1:14 But without your consent I wanted to do nothing, that your good deed might not be by compulsion, as it were, but voluntary.
Paul knew that Onesimus had sinned against Philemon. He knew that repentance, forgiveness and restitution were going to be necessary for the situation to please God. He knew it was not sufficient for Onesimus to simply ask God for forgiveness. It was not sufficient for Philemon to simply say, “I have forgiven in my heart”.
Therefore, though I might be very bold in Christ to command you what is fitting, yet for love’s sake I rather appeal to you– being such a one as Paul, the aged, and now also a prisoner of Jesus Christ– I appeal to you for my son Onesimus, whom I have begotten while in my chains, who once was unprofitable to you, but now is profitable to you and to me. I am sending him back. You therefore receive him, that is, my own heart, (Phlm. 1:12)
Paul knew that Onesimus needed to return to Philemon to ask for forgiveness, and to return himself to Philemon’s service. He wanted Onesimus to ask for forgiveness, and he wanted Philemon to receive Onesimus and grant forgiveness. And if Philemon chose to then send Onesimus off to assist Paul, it would be because of biblical forgiveness, reconciliation, and restitution.
Now remember, that under Roman law, Philemon had the right to punish Onesimus as he saw fit. In fact, under Roman law, it was rather expected that he do so. Other slaves would have been watching to see how Philemon responded to this. Other masters would have been watching as well.
But now there was a new dynamic – Onesimus was now a believer. He and Philemon were now brothers. Philemon’s testimony as a Christian was also on the line. How could Philemon show both justice and mercy?
In the opening section of this very personal letter we read of two reasons why forgiveness is crucial to the Christian life. The reason we know that is the first word of verse 8 – ‘therefore’. In verse 8 Paul begins his appeal to Philemon to forgive Onesimus, and he starts it with ‘therefore’. In other words – in light of the things I have just said in verses 4 to 7, Philemon, you must forgive.
So what are the reasons Paul gives Philemon for forgiving Onesimus?
I. You Must Forgive To Confirm Your Salvation
Paul addresses Philemon with words of praise.
Philemon 1:4-5 I thank my God, making mention of you always in my prayers, hearing of your love and faith which you have toward the Lord Jesus and toward all the saints,
Paul begins by saying that when he prays, he is thankful, because he hears that Philemon shows genuine love to others, and true faith to Christ.
Now why does Paul say this to Philemon? Is Paul a flatterer? Is Paul trying to butter Philemon up before he hits him with the hard stuff? No. Paul is saying, Philemon is a Christian. Paul has heard of two things about Philemon which belong to a regenerate, born-again believer – love and faith. And not just any love and faith, but love and faith towards Jesus Christ, and towards those that belong to Jesus Christ.
This is a strong statement that Paul believes Philemon is a born-again Christian.
- 1 Corinthians 16:22 If anyone does not love the Lord Jesus Christ, let him be accursed. O Lord, come!
- 1 John 3:14 We know that we have passed from death to life, because we love the brethren. He who does not love his brother abides in death.
Only true believers love the Lord Jesus and believe in Him and love the body of Jesus. Furthermore, what does Paul call Philemon in verses 7 and verse 20? Brother. What does he call him in verse 1? A co-labourer. If you address someone as a Christian, then what do you expect from them?
Therefore, verse 8, Philemon, I want you to forgive.
Paul is setting the stage to call on Philemon to forgive Onesimus because Philemon is a Christian and Christians forgive. If Philemon did not forgive, it would place a question mark over his own salvation.
Paul says, brother, your faith and your love have become publicly known. Your testimony as a Christian is out there. Everyone knows you are a Christian. Everyone knows that Onesimus ran away from you. But there is no sweeping this under the carpet, brother. This is a test of your love for the saints, and your faith in Jesus Christ. Now that Onesimus is counted amongst the saints, how must Philemon act towards him? In love – and that means forgiveness.
The simple truth is, Christians ought to forgive, because they have been forgiven. To not forgive, is to practically deny the Gospel. This is the main point of Jesus’ parable in Matthew 18.
Matthew 18:23-35
Therefore the kingdom of heaven is like a certain king who wanted to settle accounts with his servants.
“And when he had begun to settle accounts, one was brought to him who owed him ten thousand talents.
“But as he was not able to pay, his master commanded that he be sold, with his wife and children and all that he had, and that payment be made.
“The servant therefore fell down before him, saying, ‘Master, have patience with me, and I will pay you all.’
“Then the master of that servant was moved with compassion, released him, and forgave him the debt.
“But that servant went out and found one of his fellow servants who owed him a hundred denarii; and he laid hands on him and took him by the throat, saying, ‘Pay me what you owe!’
“So his fellow servant fell down at his feet and begged him, saying, ‘Have patience with me, and I will pay you all.’
“And he would not, but went and threw him into prison till he should pay the debt.
“So when his fellow servants saw what had been done, they were very grieved, and came and told their master all that had been done.
“Then his master, after he had called him, said to him, ‘You wicked servant! I forgave you all that debt because you begged me.
‘Should you not also have had compassion on your fellow servant, just as I had pity on you?’
“And his master was angry, and delivered him to the torturers until he should pay all that was due to him.
“So My heavenly Father also will do to you if each of you, from his heart, does not forgive his brother his trespasses.”
People who do not forgive, when they have been forgiven, are acting out an extreme form of hypocrisy. Particularly so, because of the size of the debt we have been forgiven of compared to the size of debts incurred against us. So, if a Christian does not forgive does that mean he loses his salvation? No, if a person harbours ongoing bitterness and refuses to forgive, it may reveal that he has have never experienced the joy of forgiveness himself. It may reveal he has never been saved.
This is exactly why Jesus told the Pharisee Simon the story about a creditor who forgave two debtors, one with a greater debt, the other smaller. The one with the greater debt would love the creditor more. Jesus pointed out the difference in love between the woman weeping at His feet, and Simon’s rather cold hospitality. Clearly, the woman felt her debt to be great, and therefore felt great relief in being forgiven. Simon did not.
People who walk around nursing resentment, stewing on how ill-treated they have been by others, feeling that everyone has got away with treating me badly, have probably not experienced grace. Because when you are saved, what comes home to you is that your debt before God is mountainous, and other’s debt to you is pebbles and stones by comparison.
If you profess Jesus as Saviour, but you harbour bitterness and malice and anger in your heart towards someone else, so that you would not bless them or pray for them or do them good – the Bible has something to say to you:
- 1 John 3:14-15 We know that we have passed from death to life, because we love the brethren. He who does not love his brother abides in death. Whoever hates his brother is a murderer, and you know that no murderer has eternal life abiding in him.
But Paul hints at something else by telling Philemon what he is praying for.
II. You Must Forgive To Continue Your Usefulness
Philemon 1:4-6
that the sharing of your faith may become effective by the acknowledgment of every good thing which is in you in Christ Jesus.
Paul’s prayer is that As Paul describes Philemon, he describes a man with a very fruitful ministry. The souls of many believers have been refreshed in him. So much so that Paul prays that the sharing of Philemon’s faith may continue to be effective, as Philemon acknowledges and experiences every good thing given to him in Christ.
You can break that sentence down like this. Philemon, as you continue to grow as a Christian, and continue to know Jesus Christ experientially and acknowledge what it is to be in Him, that is going to make your ministry effective. The fellowship of the faith you have with others, the sharing of your faith with others will become powerful.
Philemon already has an effective ministry.
Philemon 1:7 For we have great joy and consolation in your love, because the hearts of the saints have been refreshed by you, brother.
Paul uses this term ‘refresh’ twice. It is the same word Jesus used when He said “Come unto me all you that labour and are heavy-laden, and I will give you rest.” Philemon is like a fountain that people have come to to drink, and they have walked away encouraged, blessed, instructed. That’s a happy picture, isn’t it? Philemon is not a mean-spirited, thin-blooded, narrow old miser who scowls at the world, has contempt for most, and bears the grudges of a thousand injuries. Philemon is a joy-giving man.
Paul wants Philemon’s effectiveness and usefulness to continue. He wants Philemon’s power in ministry to be present. Now why does Paul mention that he is praying for this ministry to continue? Paul mentions this to emphasise – Philemon, you must forgive Onesimus to remain a fountain of joy to others. Paul appeals to Philemon to forgive Onesimus because if he doesn’t, his usefulness will be greatly hindered, if not quenched altogether.
And what is one thing which will destroy your ministry’s power? Bitterness. Unforgiveness. You must forgive to continue your usefulness.
I’ll give you several reasons why a lack of forgiveness will destroy your usefulness.
First, unforgiveness imprisons you in the past. You cannot look forward and outward because you are always looking backward. The wound is ever open, the pain keeps on throbbing. Have you ever known someone who took everything personally, who remembered the details of a thousand injuries done to them, who could spend hours of what could have been a perfectly joyful evening rehearsing the faults of others, and how they harmed this person?
You meet people who struggle to memorise Scripture but they have a photographic memory of what this one did to me, and what his exact words were, and what she then did. Love keeps no record of wrongs, but they have an external hard drive, where they keep these records, and they keep making back-ups.
Second, unforgiveness poisons your soul. Bitterness is a great metaphor, because if you have a bitter plant or substance that gets into water, it spreads its bitter taste throughout, and now the whole body of water has that unpleasant taste. So a bitter person has allowed bitterness to spread to everything: his thoughts, which are now cynical, vengeful; his words which are cutting, sarcastic, slanderous, his actions which are now cold, reserved. Hebrews 12:15 uses the term root of bitterness. Like anyone who has done some weeding knows, if you want to be rid of a weed, you need to pull it up by the roots. To merely snap off what is on the surface won’t help. In the same way, to merely regulate the outward expression of anger doesn’t help. If there is a root of unforgiveness in the heart, it is going to keep producing the sins of hatred, malice, coldness, indifference, gossip, slander, unkindness, divisiveness, cynicism, suspiciousness.
I heard of a pastor whose ministry was on the surface commendable. He was a good preacher, he was a family man, his church was well run and well-organised. There didn’t seem to be any evidence of neglect. But his church never seemed to experience growth. An observer asked another pastor close to this man why he thought this was so, and the man said, “A root of bitterness is still in that man’s life.”
Third, unforgiveness destroys your fellowship with God. It obstructs the flow of communication. It hinders your prayers.
Ephesians 4:30-32
And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, by whom you were sealed for the day of redemption.
Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be put away from you, with all malice.
And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God in Christ forgave you.
You quench and grieve the Spirit, refuse His empowerment, pollute your heart, crowd out the fruit of the Spirit. Sometimes a coldness in our devotions, an emptiness in prayer, a distaste for the things of God is because of a heart unforgiving. That is part of the meaning behind the Scripture which says,
Matthew 6:14-15
“For if you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you.
“But if you do not forgive men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.”
Fourth, unforgiveness invites satanic attack. Paul tells us in Ephesians 4:26-27
“Be angry, and do not sin”: do not let the sun go down on your wrath, nor give place to the devil.
Just look at the example of King Saul. As he allowed bitterness in his life, it ruined him and destroyed his effectiveness, invited even affliction by a demonic spirit. Some of the most destructive people in churches are those who have rationalised and justified and made peace with all the bitterness and anger in their hearts. They create havoc wherever they go, because they are like marionettes in Satan’s hands.
Spurgeon said of someone “May the grass grow green on his grave when he dies, for nothing ever grew around him while he lived.”
Paul hasn’t yet got to the basis of forgiveness and the actions of forgiveness. But in simply addressing Philemon, he has stated the need for it. He says, Philemon, you are a Christian. You are an effective minister. Don’t allow this matter with Onesimus to destroy all that.
Prove my words to be true. Forgive for your soul’s sake, for your ministry’s sake.
And this letter is given by inspiration of the Holy Spirit and is profitable in your life for doctrine, reproof, correction, and training in righteousness, so that you may be thoroughly equipped for every good work. You profess to be saved. And if you’re human, you’ve been hurt. By a parent. A spouse. An ungodly relative. A business partner. A boss, an employee. A criminal. Maybe if I brought that person up, you would immediately tense up, and anger would begin to rise up in you.
You want to be useful in the Master’s service. Then do not give Satan a place in your life. I wonder how many Christians are one forgiveness phone-call away from revival. I wonder how many Christians are one letter, one meeting over a cup of coffee away from a true spiritual awakening – to give and receive forgiveness.
There’s that cliché, hurting people hurt people. Yes, perhaps. But the good news, the Gospel, is that forgiven people forgive people.