Imagine for a moment you live high up on a mountain. In order to get anywhere, you have to travel down very narrow roads that spiral down the mountain. They are extremely sharp curves, and some of them are sheer drops down to the bottom. Now you want to buy a car. Two salesmen come with their offers.

The one says, “I have just the car for you. With your sharp turns and steep downhill dangerous roads, this car has the best brakes money can buy.” The second salesman comes to you and says, “I have just the car for you. With your sharp turns and steep downhill dangerous roads, this car has a built in first-aid kit. It also automatically dials the ambulance the minute it senses you are going over the cliff.”

Well, which one would you take? There is no question. We would take the car with brakes. Prevention of injury is preferable to treating injuries. Why go for a deal that can help you after you’re hurt, when you can get a deal that will prevent you from getting hurt altogether? It’s strange that, as Christians, we seem to take the other deal.

When it comes to sin, we are asked, do you want good brakes to stop you from injuring yourself in sin, or do you want first aid for after you have sinned? And most Christians seem to prefer the second one. See, God offers both. He offers forgiveness and cleansing for us when we fall (1 John 1:9). But He spends far more time in the Bible telling us how to cut the brakes on sin, how to prevent the injury altogether. God prefers prevention of sin to cure.

Some Christians do not even bother to learn how to prevent sin, they just say, “Well, 1 John 1:9 says God will forgive me.” What they don’t realise is that just like a man who would buy the car with the first aid kit instead of the one with brakes, eventually the damage will be so great it may mean it’s too late. Christians who toy with sin instead of putting the brakes on will eventually wish they had tried to prevent the sin, instead of rejoicing in its cure.

When it comes to sexual sin, God wants prevention. We looked in Part 1 of this series at the pain of sexual sin. We saw its many life-scarring effects. We took the wrapping paper off Satan’s lie, and exposed the sin for being terrible. We know now that it is a cliff, a danger, a life-threatening thing. So, being sensible, we don’t want to focus on its cure only, but place emphasis on its prevention.

The prevention of sexual sin

How do I stay pure in an impure world? How do I keep myself unspotted from sexual sin when it surrounds us on so many billboards, websites, TV shows and music videos? How is it possible? It’s more than possible by the power of the Spirit within us. Being believers, we are more than conquerors in Christ, and all the resources of heaven are available. But to access those resources, there are some practical things we must do.

In Scripture, Paul gives us three things that correspond with the Bible’s method for overcoming sin and obeying God in all other situations. For sexual sin, Paul tells us we must do some running, some reasoning and some rejoicing.

1. Running

Paul says in 1 Corinthians 6:18, “Flee fornication.” The word flee is where we get the English word ‘fugitive.’ A fugitive is someone who is continually on the run. He is trying to escape. Paul says, be continually running away. From what? ‘Fornication’ – but it refers to all sexual sin. Paul says the first step in preventing sexual sin in your life is that you must continually be running away from it.

Now stop and think about that. Did the Holy Spirit choose to say, “Fight fornication,” or ‘Flee fornication”? Why do you think that’s so? Well, if you fight something, it’s because you believe, “I am stronger, I can face this and win.” If you flee something, you are saying, “I am weaker, if confronted, I will lose.”

God says to all of us, sexual sin will beat you if you do not run away from it. Isn’t it amazing that the Bible tells us to resist the devil, but to flee fornication? It seems you have more chance of resisting the devil than your own flesh – by the power of the Spirit. See, sexual sin is something that is both outside and inside you, and if you try and face it – the traitor inside you will sell you out 100% of the time.

This is why Paul says in 1 Corinthians 10:12: “Wherefore let him that thinketh he standeth take heed, lest he fall.” The one who says, “sexual sin will conquer me, I need to run away” – is in a place of submission to God, where the Holy Spirit will enable them to say no. God resists the proud. And see, sexual sin will never give up on you. It will chase you all day every day.

You say, “I’ll get tired of running from sin.” If you are depending on yourself, yes. But if you are relying on God and trying to please Him, Isaiah 40:31 says, “But they that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.” The day you say, “I’m tired of submitting to God, I’m going to take a rest” – sexual sin will catch up with you and ruin you.

So what does it mean practically, to flee sexual sin? Well, firstly, you must flee the thought. Sexual sin begins, like all other sins, in the mind. If you cut off sexual sin in the mind, you will cut its legs off. That’s why Jesus said adultery was not just the act, it was looking upon someone in certain ways.

But every man is tempted, when he is drawn away of his own lust, and enticed. Then when lust hath conceived, it bringeth forth sin: and sin, when it is finished, bringeth forth death.
James 1:14-15

If you sow a sexual thought, it is as if conception has taken place. A baby is on its way, and it’s called sexual sin. We must flee the thought of any kind of sexuality that is outside God’s plan.

In 1 Corinthians 10:5-6, Paul tells us we must take every thought captive to the obedience of Jesus Christ. That means stand at the gate of your mind with a sword, and allow in only the thoughts that are obedient to the Lord Jesus.

See, the reason many people struggle endlessly with sexual sin is that they have, effectively, pornographic minds. They say, “I don’t watch pornography!” Well, you don’t need to, your mind is producing those images without the help of pornography. If you have a mind that thinks pornographic thoughts, that fantasises about sex before or outside of marriage, you have conceived the sin already. You have sown to the flesh, and the Bible says, you will reap corruption in due time.

We must be firm with our thinking, and cut the thoughts off before they take root. Some say, “I can’t help thinking these thoughts.” But I’ve never met a lazy student who says, “I can’t stop thinking about studying.” No, somehow, he is able to push those thoughts out his mind. It’s because he doesn’t want to think about it, that he doesn’t. You must decide if you want to think sexual thoughts, and be honest that often you think them because you gain pleasure out of it.

The second thing you need to flee is the thought-food. By this I mean all content that feeds that pornographic mind. It is in such abundance today. Many fictional books, movies, adverts, social media, shows with nudity and sex scenes, music videos, songs about sex, dating sites, dirty jokes, chats and conversations filled with sexual innuendo.

Even, sadly, remembering sexual sin from the past is a temptation in itself, which is why Satan just needs to get you on the merry-go-round, and you’ll struggle to get off. It’s everywhere. It is bad enough that our mind will lust for sexual sin by itself, but to feed that with more images and ideas is like asking for sin. Your mind will reflect what you feed it. Feed it flesh, it will be fleshly. Feed it the Spirit, it will be spiritual.

Paul says they who are led by the Spirit do mind the things of the Spirit. If I have a kettle filled with water and coffee beans, and I want the water pure, I will need to do two things – firstly, take out the beans, and secondly, keep pouring in pure water, till the old water is washed out. You can be pouring in the Word, which is pure water, but if you are seeing or listening to ungodly, fleshly material, you are putting coffee beans right back in there, and your mind will be polluted.

The worst part is, sometimes those images burn themselves into your mind. If you are serious about putting on the brakes on this sin, you will cut out all the content that feeds a pornographic mind. 1 Thessalonians 5:22 says, “Abstain from all appearance of evil.” Guard your heart, says Solomon. You are what you think, so be discerning as to the food you give your thoughts.

The third thing we need to flee from is the opportunity to sin. Paul says in Romans 13:14, “and make not provision for the flesh, to fulfil the lusts thereof.” In other words, don’t give sin any space to grow, don’t give it a chance. If you give sin a finger, it will take an arm. And our problem, especially in this area, is we give sexual sin a chance.

Proverbs 7 records the foolish young man who just happened to go by the house of the adulterous woman. Just happened to? By accident? Oh, he was just a little curious maybe? No, he was hoping at the back of his mind to meet her. It says, she caught him, and seduced him. Was he fleeing?

The man who closes his office door when he is struggling with Internet pornography – is that fleeing that sin? No, it’s making provision for the flesh. The dating couple who are alone in a house together – is that fleeing the opportunity for sin? No, it’s following after it. You deceive yourself thinking, “Oh, we want to be pure.” Yes, but you are dipping your feet in the pool of sin, to test the waters, and you will find how deceitful your own heart is.

The woman who lingers in conversation with an attractive colleague when her marriage is low is not fleeing sexual sin, she is making provision for the flesh. If you want to avoid sexual sin, severely limit your chances to sin. Get accountability – make sure there are people around, if possible, have a close friend who can pray for you and check up on you. Limit yourself. And remember Joseph, when Potipher’s wife grabbed him – he literally fled! What an example of a desire for righteousness.

Recall that Jesus said, if your hand offends you – cut it off. He was teaching that when we are dealing with sin, there needs to be a swift, often painful, death to our sinful desires. See, if you try and saw off your hand, you will never succeed. But a quick chop ends it. The reason why we fail in sexual sin is we toy with temptation, like trying to saw off your hand – “Should I, shouldn’t I?” instead of a quick chop – a dash, fleeing, running away.

We must flee the thought, flee the thought–food, and flee the opportunity. How can we sin sexually when we so thoroughly cut sexual sin off at the root? Nevertheless, Paul goes further.

2. Reasoning

Paul now moves to the mind. You are what you think. The mind is the control centre of everything. You behave sexually according to your sexual beliefs. This is the crucial place where there must be a renewing, a change. Because you can stop doing some things, and start doing some others – but until your attitudes, your beliefs, change, those outward actions will not permanently change.

Paul says you need to do some meditating – serious contemplation of some truths about this issue. He tells us to think about:

• Firstly, consider the pain of sexual sin.

He says, all other sins are essentially done outside yourself. But to sin sexually is to violate yourself. Paul is trying to make us understand that sexual sin has consequences. The Bible is strong on warning you of consequences. The whole book of Proverbs warns of sin’s consequences. The problem is not that we like to harm ourselves, the problem is that we don’t believe that sexual sin will harm us.

Like the child you tell, “Don’t touch the stove, it will burn you.” Do they believe you? No, they don’t want to harm themselves, but their unbelief in your words makes them go ahead anyway. The alcoholic doesn’t believe the drink will harm him. Oh, he may admit that drink will harm him one day, but this drink, right now won’t kill me.

If you do not believe that sexual sin will cause all the pain that we talked about in Part 1 of this series, you will go ahead because you believe it will be good for you. See, Ephesians 5:29 says, “For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it.” We don’t intentionally harm ourselves, we do so when we are deceived.

We must keep before us the things we looked at in Part 1 – sexual sin damages your life; it robs you of joy in marriage; it enslaves you; it creates unnatural bonds; it starts fires that weren’t meant to be burning; it clothes you in guilt, it numbs you to God; it has physical and financial consequences.

Who ever committed sexual sin while consciously thinking about those things? No one – the first step to sexual sin is to hide from yourself its consequences. We must do some reasoning – meditate on it till you believe that sexual sin really is more pain than pleasure.

• Secondly, consider the presence of the Spirit

Paul says, are you not aware, are you not consciously thinking that your physical body is the physical temple of the Holy Spirit which God gave you? The word temple is the Greek word used to describe the Holy of Holies in the Old Temple – that place where only the High priest could go. He is saying the body of a believer is the most sacred spot on earth because God the Holy Spirit lives there – He is a resident.

How should we react to this? Well, think about everyday life. When people walk into a large, beautiful sanctuary with stained-glass windows and high ceilings – how do they react? They start to whisper or go silent. They feel they must act reverently – their behaviour changes upon entering a place that they think is sacred.

Or consider how people change their behaviour when the pastor walks in the room – some conversations stop, others change, people act differently. Why? The thought that someone in authority is here – they are watching me. Now both of these things are true according to this verse – your body is a sacred spot, and the Holy Spirit Himself is here – in you, watching you. But does it change our behaviour? The problem is that we are not meditating on it.

Can you watch pornography while consciously thinking, “God is here?” Can the dating couple begin physical love while thinking, “The Spirit is watching, this body is sacred?” Can you begin some sexual sin of the body and consciously think, “God the Spirit is inside this body that am about to use in a defiling way?” I mean, would you commit that sexual sin in front of another human? No.

Again, the problem is that we hide from that fact, instead of thinking about it often. Paul says, “reason” – think about it. As Proverbs 5:21 puts it, “For the eyes of the LORD are in every place, beholding the evil and the good.”

• Thirdly, consider the price that God paid.

Paul says, you do not belong to yourselves. You and your body are the property of God, and it was purchased with the precious blood of Jesus. Tell me, would you drive another man’s car recklessly? Would you go into another woman’s home and dirty things without cleaning them, or break things without fixing? No, we would surely feel some sense of responsibility. Well, Paul is telling us to realise that our bodies are in fact someone else’s property – God’s.

Once again – it’s our beliefs. When you sin sexually – be it with your eyes, your ears, or the rest of you – are you thinking, “Okay, God, I know this belongs to you, but I’d like to use it for sin for a moment?” No, that is the furthest thing from your mind. You believe, in that moment, that your body is yours to do with as you please. You are exercising unbelief.

We need to meditate on this fact till we believe it. Think it through. Think of the price Jesus paid to purchase your body. And when you sin sexually, you are saying His sacrifice was worthless, you are driving another nail into His hands, you are saying, “So what if You bought me with the pain of the cross? I will still do as I please.” Oh, how we trample on the blood of Jesus with our sin. How we count His separation from the Father as a light thing when we sin with a high hand.

You know what sexual sin is? Sexual sin is taking the body that God designed to respond sexually – He made it that way – and using those God-given functions in a way that He hates. That’s like getting money from your husband and spending it on prostitutes. So Paul says, think about these things. Change your heart.

Romans 12:2 calls this the renewing of your mind – it is the thing that transforms you, then your thinking changes. You need to memorise 1 Corinthians 6:18-20. You need to chew on it. You need to call it up when you are tempted.

There needs to be some running – fleeing the thoughts, fleeing the thought-food, and fleeing the circumstances. But the foundation of that fleeing, the source, is a love relationship with God that agrees with Him in your mind, your reasoning, your beliefs. You agree with God that sexual sin is painful. You understand, “You, God, are not trying to hold out on me – Satan is holding the truth out on me when he tempts me.”

You believe that the Spirit is here, and your love for Him causes you to not want to grieve Him, because you fear God. And as you consider the love that Jesus had in dying for you, you respond by realising, “This body belongs to God. He paid the highest price for me. I will love Him by keeping this body pure and sacred. He must feel at home in my body.”

3. Rejoicing

The final stage of defeating sexual sin in our lives is rejoicing. So many people miss this stage, and it is so important. I will say that if you do not have this stage, even if you have the other two – the running and the reasoning – you will still fail. Because this is the replacement. You are running from sexual sin, but now you must run to this thing. You must have the negative – the putting off, but now you need the positive – the putting on.

So many Christians miss out this step and wonder why they fail. You must see that the Christian life is not primarily about saying no. It is primarily about saying yes. It is not a negative life; it is a positive life. We hate sin, because it stops us from loving God. We say no to sin because we want to say yes to righteousness. We put off so we can put on.

If you simply flee fornication, if you simply say no to sexual sin, and do not say yes to something better – do you know what will happen? Your heart will begin to grow hungrier and hungrier. It is good that you are denying self what is sinful, but you are not feeding it something good, and your heart was made to enjoy things, to want to be happy.

All humans want to feel fulfilled, happy, joyful – it’s not a sin. Jesus promised that abiding in Him would make our joy full. And He warned that if you do not replace what you remove, something worse will replace it. He spoke of when a demon is cast out – it wanders around, and then comes back. If it finds nothing has replaced it, and the place looks clean and swept, it returns with seven spirits more wicked than itself.

If you deny sexual sin, but do not glorify God, your flesh will grow hungrier, and eventually it will be like a ravenous wolf. It will binge, it will be a glutton for some pleasure, it will do worse things than before. We need to replace the sexual sin with Paul’s commandment to glorify God in your body and spirit. So what does that mean? We can sum it up in one word – contentment.

See, how is God glorified in a believer? He is glorified when people observe a life that is satisfied in God, and they reason, “God is more than enough for that person, so He must be great.” When people see a contented Christian – they want to know about this thing which fulfils, when they have tried sex and food and relationships and entertainment and power and money and fame, and none of it satisfied them.

So Paul is really saying, be contented, physically and spiritually.

If you are single, that means physically, you submit to God’s decision to keep you single at this time. You rejoice in the food, the health, and the abilities that God has given you, and are thankful for them. You must seek to have a self-disciplined body, which means watching what you eat, watching how long you sleep, giving it exercise.

In this way you say, “God is more than enough for me. I am content with the physical joys God has given me at this time. I am not envious of those who have been given the gift of sex in marriage – I am thankful for what I do have. I enjoy my body as God allows. So I run from sexual sin – but I run to the other gifts God allows me to have.”

If you are married, glorifying God in your body means enjoying the gift of physical love with your marriage partner. It means rejoicing with each other. We need to see more Christian married couples who glorify God by showing how contented they are with each other in marriage. We need to see more examples of satisfied, contented couples that says to the singles – that’s what I want! So we must glorify God with our contentment physically.

Spiritually, it is simple. It is saying, “God – you are enough for me! More than enough.” Sexual sin is an act of idolatry. You may turn from God as your source of joy, love and intimacy to this god of sexual sin, believing it will bring you joy, but it doesn’t. It’s idolatry and unbelief – refusing to believe that Christ is the Living Water – he that drinks from Him will not thirst again.

We refuse to seek God in fellowship for joy and meaning, and so turn to the weak and foolish area of sexual sin. We must not fill our hunger for God with sexual sin – we must fill that void in our hearts with God Himself. We must say – God is enough for me; I am content with God. God fills me in a way that sexuality, even in marriage, could never do. So we glorify God.

You need this positive. You need to fill the void with God. You need to flee from sin, but follow after Christ. You need to run from sexual sin – to the face of Jesus. You must seek God-given contentment in Him, both physically through His gifts, and spiritually through Him in fellowship. Running, reasoning and rejoicing.

Can you imagine a man struggling with pornography who consistently cuts off the thoughts in his mind, stops looking at and listening to sexual content, who keeps his doors open and has accountability, who thinks hard about the pain of sexual sin, who reminds himself that the Spirit is here, who thinks hard on the fact that Jesus’ agony bought his body for God, and who seeks contentment in God in the areas God has given him – can you imagine him continuing in it?

Likewise, with the dating couple, the one given over to evil thoughts, the man tempted to have an affair, and all other forms of sexual sin. I cannot see how if we apply God’s Word, relying on the Spirit – how we can fail. God’s Word never fails – we simply fail to obey God’s Word.

So we need to do some running – from the thoughts, the thought-food, and the circumstances. We need to do some reasoning – about the pain of sexual sin, the presence of the Spirit and the price God paid. And we must do some rejoicing – seeking contentment in God. With these three things, we can put the brakes on sexual sin in our lives.